You Kissed Back

How do you respond
when the one
says she kissed someone…

The sip drips down my throat
hot and sweet
as it seeps
into my pores
and out pours
the angst of my stance
an emotional dance
as i tango around the gold liquid in my glass
i try and mask
how fucked up i really am
slowly i jam
myself into a subdued feeling
of not feeling
at all
i fall
into myself
and ward off any help
from this pain
i feel pain
in the middle of my chest
it will not rest
it just keeps pounding
these hollow halls sounding
the ringing in my ears
i couldn’t have heard clear
that all that i fear
could seriously take form
and cause the mourning of my heart
how could you start
your words with i would never hurt you
i feel like such a fool
because certainly
that’s exactly what you did
and i hate to admit
it hurts
its the worst kind of pain i’ve ever felt
and i’m not even unfamiliar with
it
i just thought that this
was different
surely you were different
heaven sent
what i meant
when i said my total world
i guess i am an incompetent girl
since you were easily led away from me
while i couldn’t be
there
i was always aware
of the viciousness that laid in the dark
but you had my heart
and i just knew you would protect it with your life
because i am your wife
but here i sit in agony and strife
who uses a knife to cut you open
and pleads with words spoken
it was a mistake
i would never hurt you
what do you do with that
just lay on your back
and take it?
It was only a mistake
Just you wait
I’ll make good on my word
I’ll make action out of these verbs
you can put the glass down
knowing i will be around
to protect you
that’s what i do
i really am a fool
to think i was more than what i am
only this glass understands
golden brown liquid in my hand
burning as it goes down
and calms the ache in my chest
and the mess i am
because you kissed back.

all rights reserved. 12may2018

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Ameehsal MindSpeaka

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